Monday Tips || 02.06.14

June is finally here, I hope we have lots of June Bride & Grooms. Did you all get much wedding planning done this weekend? Or maybe did you attend a wedding? Saturday was perfect weather for a wedding wasn't it. Whatever you got up to I hope you all had a good one.

I have a whole list of things I want to feature as a Monday Tip, so choosing one is always difficult. This week I thought I'd discuss the Grooms "role" in the wedding planning process. I would really love it if you could e-mail me any feedback because from my experience as past Bride and from meeting couples through my line of work - I know each couple has their own system and what works for them.

I've mentioned in an earlier post that when we first got engaged, me and Mark spent a few days planning a phantom wedding - unrealistic budget and location, but it was great because for me it gave me a real idea of what Mark wanted for his wedding (yep I did sometimes need reminding that it wasn't just MY day)

We found our venue by accident, we stopped off their to meet a friend who was working there after a disastrous meeting at the venue we thought we wanted. The manager offered to do a walk-through with us; when we saw the great big fireplace at the end of their breakfast room we both knew it - this was where we were getting married. Neither of us needed convincing  - we both had the same vision for the ceremony (and the reception room - well, neither of us cared really)

Mark had already chosen the colour scheme (I knew it would be purple, it's his favourite colour) and for a February wedding it was perfect. He was happy with a Cup-cake wedding cake so let me take my Nain to meet Sue of Tier Celebration Cakes to choose the designs and flavours. I'm not creative so let him have free reign when it came to designing the stationary. It probably sounds like chaos to most of you but it worked for us, the wedding was a joint effort and neither of us felt the other was taking over.

I'd find in work that there was always two different scenario's; either I'd see the Groom for every single wedding meeting - or I'd see him twice; when he came to see the Hotel with his Fiancée and on their wedding day. Some Grooms thoroughly enjoyed planning a wedding - others we're happy enough just being told what time to turn up where. There are some who want to contribute in some of the big decisions like the venue but happy to let his Bride decide on the Menu's and table decorations (that might be a poor example, but you get my drift no?)

The point is this; recognise which category your man falls in to early. You don't want to be trying your best to involve him in designing your bouquets and buttonholes if he doesn't know one flower from another. Equally there is no point in you taking on the mammoth task of planning your wedding all by yourself while your Groom feels he has no input. You don't want to get yourself upset and "he doesn't care about the wedding", he asked you to marry him because he wan't to marry you- that's the only thing that's important at the end of the day.

We hadn't even thought about Ceremony music when we started planning our wedding, then we met a harpist at a Wedding Fayre who played Pachelbel's Canon in D and it seemed like the obvious choice and we made the decision together. But when it came to organising the centrepieces for the wedding reception room - I went ahead and ordered the Candelabras myself, I knew he wouldn't have any interest and would be happy as long as it wasn't anything too OTT.

Are there any Grooms out there who would like share their wedding planning experience for a future Monday Tips post, I think it would be interesting to see things from a Groom's point of view. Maybe you disagree with my ideas or maybe you agree with me, either way it would be great to hear from you; hello@onceuponanorthwaleswedding.com

Gemma xx